Karilynnbryant’s Weblog

Update: St Louis (or…Saint Charles, Really)

We have been in our “new” rental house for about 2 months now in a suburb of Saint Louis, Mo.   The first thing that comes to my mind is:  I HATE CARPET.  That being said, I feel a lot like I felt when we first moved from Nebraska to Cincinnati.  Except that THANK GOD we are not living in a hotel room.  Sam is now the age that Mayah WAS when we moved that time, and he is exhibiting a lot of the same behaviors she did.  Potty training regression, confusion, fear, defiance.  Yes, the nice ones!  We are renting here for a year.  Our house in Cincinnati is still for sale.  Our realtors suck.  They basically did NOTHING because they knew our house would eventually be bought by Luke’s company anyhow.  We’ve recieved Bunge’s offer on our house, which is a lot less than what we’d hoped for.  Now we are working on the “to do” list that they give us to accomplish before they will actually buy the house.  Our realtor somehow seems to be much more on top of getting a handyman over to our house, etc…which has made me quite curious.   The whole process should be over by the end of the month.  At that time, we will have to pay the difference of what we owe on our house after the buyout .  Basically this means, we will not be able to buy again for a while.  Part of me likes this, the time to get a feel for “here,”  but deep down, the nesting part of me, the “mommy” part of me, wants to be settled and to not have to move again.  St Louis is Bunge’s headquarters, so this should be where we stay for a while, but then there is the other incredibly hard decision of WHERE to live in this huge city.    Oh, and lest you forget…Saint Louis was just ranked our nation’s most dangerous city!

I can’t really tell a lot about the area we live in yet because it’s been a pretty cold, snowy winter here (except for the freak warm days followed by tons of rain and tornadoes).  Although we lived in a suburb in Ohio, this one feels a lot bigger, a lot “whiter” and much more cookie cutter.    It’s been harder to adapt here as it IS winter, and the neighborhood we live in has no sidewalks.  There is not anywhere we could walk to even if we wanted to.  It is very BIG, very spread out, and has less of that midwest feel.   That being said, Mayah loves her new preschool, and we have joined the Rec Plex, and have enjoyed the library a lot lately.  Those are a plus.   As we think about where to make our permanent home, we’ve thought a lot about schools, nice neighborhoods, country versus city, sidewalks, land, suburbia, size of yard, size of house…and onandonandon…I can’t decide really where I want to live.  A lot of it was really riding on schools at first because Mayah is starting Kindergarten in the fall.  But the more I’ve thought about this, the more I am considering homeschooling (which is an entirely different post in itself).

 

As I’ve thought back over our moves and changes, although it seems the circumstances for this one have been much easier, my mood, my tone seems much more bleak.   I am tired.  I am restless.  Indecisive.  Worried.   And so…we are here,  tornadoes and all!  We are getting settled.  And yet, we are not settled.  We’ve unpacked the necessities, and tried a bit of the decoratives, but for the most part, to heck with unpacking every single box.  Who knows where we’ll be at this time next year?  We may have moved yet again!

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